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So you've got a great pic of yourself. Now you're
ready to try and woo someone sexy away from her keyboard for
an initial meeting.
You may also want to know what to say when replying
to a woman's ad.
The advice I have to give you here is much the same as the
advice I gave you about photos: DO NOT BE TOO VULGAR. By that
I do not mean don't be sexy. I love reading sexy emails. In
fact there's nothing like playing with yourself while reading
a sexy email while looking at the guy who sent it to you.
I've soaked many a pair of panties that way.
However, some guys get it really wrong. They don't realize
that most us girls like to be seduced a bit more gently than
guys. Many guys also use language that conjures up negative
images.
Let me give you some examples. I get a lot of very short emails
from guys telling me in just a couple of lines that they like
my pic and want to meet me or want to have sex with me. What
a boring email. Trash can here we go! I also get a lot of
emails from guys who just lauch into some really graphic image
about wanking themselves off. Another thing that's a turn
off is getting emails from guys who use non sexy language,
for example, "I've been slapping my meat". Those are all great
fun things to say when you're having fun with your buddies
- they don't make us oversexed girls want to jump into bed
and suck you off.
I don't think you should ask a woman for sex the first time
you contact her - even if her ad or reply was very sexy. I
think you should be a bit more subtle than that. Remember
also that very few women are going to say, "Yes, I want sex
- your place or mine?" The vast majority of women are going
to want to meet you first to check you out. Not just to see
whether they find you attractive but to see if you are a nice
guy. Being a nice guy is pretty important. This initial meeting
can take place in a bar or restaurant or wherever. The point
I'm trying to make is do not try and arrange sex straight
away and make her feel more relaxed by offering to meet up
to get to know each other.
Before I give you a basic structure for your ad
content or reply remember Nikki's top secret tip:
Top Secret Tip: The girl may be in
a different mindset when she reads your reply. I've often
been feeling really sexy when I've replied to a guy's ad or
email. However, I may read your reply when I'm not feeling
quite so sexy. So don't get carried away when you write a
reply. Write something about yourself, your likes and dislikes
- something that will appeal to a woman whether she is feeling
hot or not.
Use the initial contact to tell her about yourself and let
her check out your photo. Of course you don't want to come
across as boring - you have to arouse her interest and make
her want to find out more.
Remember always that women love it when a guy
takes an interest in THEM and doesn't talk or write only about
himself. so always express interest in the other person: what
they like, what they dislike etc.
Also remember that a woman is in a very different
position to a man. Even if she's keen to get laid she may
be wary of hooking up with a weirdo. You have to put yourself
in her shoes. Make sure she feels in no way intimidated, treat
her with respect at all times.
On a lighter note remember that women love guys
with a great sense of humor. So lighten up and enjoy yourself.
and never be arrogant or boastful. I get so many emails from
guys telling me what great lovers they are. It gets very repetitive.
Here's a basic structure for your reply:
- Greet her, tell her how nice she looks and that you liked
what she said in her ad. I'm amazed at how many guys don't
read what I've written!
- Introduce yourself tell her who you are (not some stuipid
assumed name like Bigdick).
- Tell her some pertinent facts about yourself, what you
do for work, what you look like (don't be too arrogant!),
your likes and your dislikes and what you're looking for.
- Do not suggest you meet up for sex - that can come later.
- Maybe ask for more photos and offer to end some more of
your own
Summary: don't be vulgar in your ad or when
you reply. Most women will either find it intimidating or
a turn off. Just be natural and warm. Most girls will find
that really appealing.
If the lady in question is interested and starts
emailing you back, once again don't rush things. Also remember
my cardinal rules about sending emails and using photographs.
You may still be competing for attention with lots of other
guys in her inbox.
December 2003
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