The Online Dating Tips Guide
The world of online dating can be a precarious field to venture into. Non-age specific and available to anyone of any gender or sexual preference, in this day and age of technology, more and more people are turning to the internet to find their perfect match. You can search by any specified criteria, from religion to sense of humor to favorite movies to just based on looks alone and future goals. Overall, online dating is more convenient for most people because it can be done from the safety and comfort of home. With just the simple click of a mouse, you can flip through hundreds if not thousands of online internet profiles of perspective mates. By entering in a few simple requirements in blank fields, you can flush pout those who do not meet your standards and focus on getting to know those who do.
There are several kind of sites out there that cater to certain desires. Christian mingling, sites for gays and lesbians, and sites for old widowers looking for someone to live out the rest of their days. Everyone desires to have someone. Someone to share jokes with, someone to watch movies with, someone to hold hands and kiss and share a warm bonding experience. Desired traits in a possible spouse vary from person to person, but the basics remain true: all of us want someone to love.
But, let us also not forget: the internet playground can be a dangerous place to visit. Threats exist at every turn from identity theft to spam to hackers. The internet is a fun place to explore, but safety must be taken into credible consideration for yourself and your future, especially so when it comes to getting to know someone whom, before your initial “poke” at each other, was a complete stranger to you.
To better improve your chances at finding a compatible significant other and doing so with confidence and no fear, consider the following online dating tips to help navigate your way towards potential happiness and a possible future mate.
-Test the waters, and judge the site.
Dating websites are a lot like a new pair of shoes: you have to try a few pair on until you find the one that does you right. Every online dating site out there can claim to be the best, claim to offer you the best, and promise to have you married by the end of the year. But, these sites also go through their own application processes and, based on your criteria, they can ban or admit whomever they like. So finding the site which will let you have access to their already multiple members in their databanks might be more time consuming than you initially realize.
Alternatively, you will need to find a site that respects views in yourself and in others. It does not do to consider applying to a Christian-only site when you practice different faiths. However, a devout Christian on the same site would have a much higher success rate. Check to see if the site promotes certain qualities and criteria, such as religion, alternative sexual preferences, age, or otherwise. Find a dating site that respects the same views you do and you are more likely to find someone who shares similar interests.
-Always remember safety first.
Your safety should be your primary concern. Take precautions to not give out personal information, such as physical address, phone number, place of work and credit card information to a party you do not trust or have never met. The problem with the internet is prevalent anonymity. Without ever meeting the person face to face or at least having a few conversations with them, you have no idea who is on the other end of the computer at the keyboard.
Trust your gut instincts. You know the difference between butterflies in your stomach and a genuine sense of unease. If internal alarms are going off either by just looking at the persons picture or during the first few chats back and forth, you are perfectly within your right to say “Thanks, but no thanks,” and move on to the next potential date. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain.
When you do decide to agree to a date, especially a first date, make sure the location is someplace local and public. Sure, you may have had a few great instant messenger chats and phone calls, but how much do you still really know about a person until you meet face to face? For your own protection and theirs, a public place with plenty of eye witnesses will lessen the likelihood of an unpleasant incident. If the other party seems adamant to meeting in a private location, reconsider, often and hard. Remember, there is nothing wrong with you saying no.
-When crafting your profile, simplicity is the key.
Your profile is the first thing that a potential romantic interest will peruse before contacting you any further. So, for the sake of time and effort, keep your profile simple and to the point. State your wants and desires frankly and get them out there and in the open. Anyone willing to fulfill those needs and desires will stick around and get to know more about you. Anyone who does not will move on and save you both the time of getting to know that you just are not compatible which could have been spent elsewhere.
No one wants to read a novel while on a dating site and no one needs to know your life story right away. Save that sort of thing for the ‘getting to know you’ stage of the relationship. In the meantime, just give a short list of your likes and dislikes. Mention your hobbies, if you have kids. Think of it if you only had one hundred words to tell someone about you, what would you chose to say?
-Be honest and stay current.
You do no want to be accused of giving the wrong impression so don’t give an anonymous caller the chance. When writing your profile, be up front and honest. If you smoke, tell them that you smoke. If you do not like roses, mention it. The same applies for your profile picture and subsequent album photos. Be honest; don’t think you can get away by calling a nine month old photo ‘current.’ When they say current, they mean current. A lot of consideration is given to that photo. Save the older photos for a cozy night at home where the two of you can break out each others albums and really get to know one another better.
-Communication will get you far.
Since you are meeting these new people online, means of communication are at first very limited. Be open to talking either over private messages and online messaging. If someone asks you a question, answer the question as soon as you can. Someone is initiating a conversation with you which means they are interested in getting to know more about you. Similarly, if you find the person lacking, there is nothing wrong with telling them. They will probably appreciate your honesty and willingness to be frank about it. But you have to communicate. It advocates for yourself and your needs in an already stressful environment.
-Be respectful. Of everyone.
You are going to have to check a lot of profiles and even reject a few bad apples. But, just because you do not like someone does not mean you get to act irrationally and disrespectfully towards them. Other members are on this online dating site for the very same reason as you, so consider how you would feel if someone suddenly said something mean and impolite. No one likes to be talked down to so whether it is arguing a political point or rejecting an offer, take time to consider your words very carefully. No need to lie about your feelings, but avoid harsh words and name-calling. Everyone and anyone is inclined to agree to disagree.
-Be on the lookout for married man/women.
While you may be honest and upfront about your wants, desires, and dreams, you cannot trust every anonymous user to do the same. Plenty of married men and women have less than honorable intentions towards their marriages and plan to involve you in it. It may take some time, but try to be on the lookout for telltale signs that the person you are chatting with might have another significant other. Clues like insisting on meeting in unscrupulous locations like hotels and areas where they are less likely to be seen, restrictions between times to call and contact them, randomly cutting communications at any given point, just to name a few. That is not to say that every person on the internet is married and looking for an affair, but just take extra care to be aware. Again, trust your gut instincts. Chances are, they are not as serious about the prospect of a relationship as you are.
-Be realistic about your results.
These things take time. Building a friendship, building a business, learning to drive a car and learning a new skill, all of these things take time, patience, and sometimes a mishap or two. So will finding a relationship that will last. The first person who sends you a request to chat and get to know you better might not be the one you are looking for. Maybe not the second or the third either. The only way you are going to know is through trial and error, holding conversations and asking questions, getting active and out there, willing to meet new people and try new things. You have already made the step towards looking into online dating, now is the time to put this resource to the test. Take your time weeding out the ones who are no good, or just don’t fit, until you find the right person who fits like a pair of shoes made just for you.
No one site can guarantee your happiness. Only you can be the appropriate judge of your own future. Take these online dating tips into healthy consideration as you get started building your personal profile and exploring which site will get you the best results. No one has more at stake in your future together with someone who has the same interests and dreams, so be smart about how you approach them.